Holiday season is upon us, and let's be honest, sometimes holiday cheer can be overwhelming. During the holiday season, we often get wrapped up in expectation of holiday cheer and forget that life actually happens where there are moments of good, bad, beautiful, and ugly. We may spiral into deep depression, sadness, grief, or heightened anxiety while the rest of the world continues marketing holiday cheer and "the happiest time of the year". It seems like everyone is having fun but you, and it can be difficult to feel a part of the festivities when you are hurting. These feelings can be challenging to manage, but there are strategies that can help make these feelings more manageable.

 

Depression

                Seasonal depression is often on the rise around the holidays which can start due to less daylight in the wintertime and less exposure to natural light and its impact on our body’s rhythm. Additionally, the holiday season can be stressful. People are often busier and trying to balance work and personal obligations, which can lead to more stress. This season can also be financially stressful since gift giving and events are flowing abundantly. We are also more likely to compare ourselves to others during this time of year as we see all that friends or family are doing. It is so easy to see other’s social media and think that their life is more perfect than it really is. It is so important to remember that social media only shows the highlights of a person’s life and does not represent everything they may be going through or how they feel.

                It is so important to take care of yourself during the holiday’s especially when experiencing depression. Ask yourself if you are expecting too much from yourself or others and determine if your expectations are helpful or hurtful. Remember it is okay to say ‘no’. You are only one person and there is only so much you can do in a day. Take a break from social media if seeing others holiday photos or posts are causing you to compare yourself. Most importantly, consider talking with a mental health professional.

 

Grief

                Grief is weird. It presents itself differently each time and pops up again right when we least expect it. Grief is something that takes time to process and may come back in bursts, especially around the holidays when family is the focus. It’s important to acknowledge the emotions we are experiencing and process them. This may mean taking time away from others to think, journal, cry, etc. or it may be helpful to talk with others. Be patient with yourself and allow yourself the ability to feel those emotions.

                The loss of a loved one is never easy and may be heightened throughout the holidays, so it may be beneficial to acknowledge and process throughout the holidays through celebration of the loved and lost. It can be so difficult to move forward without a loved one, but one way to cope with the pain of loss is through celebrations and new traditions. It may be helpful to set a place at the table for them with their picture, make their favorite holiday dish, light a candle by their picture, or talk about happy memories of that loved one. The pain may not go away, but when we focus on the life they lived and ways in which we continue to carry them with us, it may make it easier to move forward.

 

                Enjoying the holidays does not mean denying your feelings or pretending to be something you are not. One of the major culprits of suffering is isolation. We were not meant to do life alone, but in community. Being authentic to yourself and others allows for healthy self-care and connection. If you are dealing with challenging emotions and the holidays are difficult for you, please reach out for support.